Back in mid-2004, we had an Open House party on the old Fluffy Bunny Board. One of the activities was a "worst paragraph" contest. The results were so much fun (and horrible), we couldn't leave them behind!
Thread stated by imloco2 on May 24, 2004Worst paragraph -
Okay, this is easier to do. Well it is for me. *g* I envision this as starting out "On a dark and stormy night..." But then I kind of like that beginning. :-) Come on and do your worst... we won't laugh. Much. Winner gets a costume card of Virginia Hey as Zhaan..
Just add your paragraph in a reply and you're entered. Easy!
(Winners will be chosen by bunnies imloco2, tazey and aeryncrichton, all bunnies are ineligible to enter the contests for the obvious reasons and all contests end on Friday, May 28, at 6:00 pm)
MadScientist on May 24, 2004Vorng-ing. Again. Naturally. That was how it began, that Wednesday night. No, wait. It was Thursday. Wasn't it? I was... No, that was somebody else. Yeah. And at the time, I couldn't even
spell vorng. Now I can. And I wish to God I couldn't!
lobsteronmyhead on May 25, 2004OK, my humble entry in the Worst First Paragraph:
Yes, he'd heard her call for him; and no, he was not about to respond. John knew, in his heart of hearts, that if he had to deal with just one more pile of blue/green gravy-ied Space Carp crap, diaper full of baby shit or puddle of Royal Hynerian vomit, he was going to throw himself (sans spacesuit) into the nearest wormhole he could find.
Respectfully,
: loby
MadScientist on May 26, 2004Paragraph bad the. Words. Around they were. Switched. Thought, I did, back. Switched. They could be. Could be. But not. And quitors. Seq. Non. Pizza. Happened, did they. Round. And round. Switched. Oh, bad, so. Did I mention Farscape?
cybergal on May 27, 2004I'm assuming that you mean "bad" in the Bulwer-Litton writing (hahaha...) style....
It was a dark and stormy night in the Uncharted Territories, not that you could ever tell whether it was day or night out in deep, dark, space, but I digress, the night was dark and stormy and the passages on the ship were dark, creepy and silent as she quietly hurried through to her rendezvous with the tall, dark, handsome man who called himself human, just the thought of him made her voluptuous breasts quickly rise and fall above the tight confines of her tight black leather bodice, just the thought of him ripping off her bodice like the last time -- that made her pick up her steps and hurry faster as she rounded the corner, she runs into someone and screams a blood curdling scream that would have woken the dead, if they had any dead on board to hear the scream, but there wasn't, so the scream fades away down the empty corridors as a very muscular and now familiar arm wraps around her trembling body as the light flashes and she can see the humour in the 20/20 baby blues, as he was prone to call his inferior eyes, but it was too late that she recognized him, as cycles of training to react to assault took over and she automatically Pantak jabbed him and flipped him down to the floor with a loud "oooof" and was astride him yelling, "on the ground now" before he even hit the cold hard floor and she could see the laughter in those baby blues that she could drown in time and time again.
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Man, after going away and coming back to read it again, I realize that this is a really, really, really bad paragraph..... My sincerest apologies to Ms. English (that really was her name.), my former English teacher.
MadScientist on May 27, 2004Oh, man, deja vu!
- NANCY: [Off] Nick!
- SOUND: Running down stairs.
- NICK: (It was Nancy, running down the stairs. All the familiar sounds and smells of Pig Night came rushing back like a good snort of Scotch. Then, it struck me.)
- SOUND: Dull thud.
- NICK: (Passing out) (Twenty years later, and she still knocked me out! Oh . . .)
- SOUND: Body falling.
- MUSIC: Transition, then under.
The Adventures of Private Nick Danger, Third Eyethe Firesign Theatre
(It always helps to keep your thumb on your script, so you don't lose your place!)
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